I'm Still Here

I'm OK.  There's nothing wrong.  Life has been busy.  I've been under the weather.  There's a lot going on that I will soon write about and share with you here.

January went by so fast.  We experienced our first snowstorm in Seattle and realized why this city is paralyzed by any amount of snow.  The city has zero budget to manage snow and ice.  Mark and I had about 4-5 inches total of snow in our neighborhood.  None of the streets around us were plowed including the major streets.  I was shocked.  But, it turns out that they don't have plows here.  The few that they do have are used on the highways.  It was nice because everything literally shut down and Mark didn't have to go to his office for a few days.  We played in the snow and took some long walks.

We've been house hunting, which is a lot of fun.  It's like being a part of house hunters!  We have a great agent who used to be a builder so he's able to help us look not only at the surface but deeper at the foundation and bones of each home and tell us whether it's a good home or not.  We're learning to look beyond the cosmetic and at what makes a quality, long-term home.  It's super fun!

One of my cousins got engaged!

I signed up for an art class that started on February 2.

Things are good.  I just need to get back on track with writing on this blog.  And, I will.  Soon.  I promise this to myself.

Until then I hope that everyone is doing well and enjoying life.

More Thoughts on Blogging

We live in a "ME" world, where many thoughts, ideas and ways of life are self-centered and self-focused.  Blogging is often an area where one is self-centered.  Whether it be about oneself or one's family and life, blogging is primarily about "me."

Casey Anthony's video blog was released either by she or by someone else a day or so ago.  The media is ripping it apart and in one report counted the number of times she said the word "I."  They said it as if that was a wrong thing.  I'm not sure that it is wrong for her to say "I" so many times, as it was HER video blog.  Yes, I think she is a sociopath who killed her own child (intentionally or unintentionally) and covered it up.  Yes, I think it is odd for her not to mention her child.  But, it is HER video blog.  One that I imagine she never thought would be viewed by the outside world - or maybe she did but regardless it is HER video blog.

I view blogging as a sort of journal.  At least that is what I planned when I started out using my blog.  In the past year I tried to make it something more.  I don't think I like what direction it was taking.  It wasn't me.  I want to be open and honest and share myself and not what clothes I like or what I made for dinner.  I plan to do be more open and honest again but at the same time keeping some of those issues that I wrote about yesterday in mind.  Maintain some privacy.  I want to be able to use the pronoun "I" as often as I want and not be judged.

It's hard to write a blog as a journal without making it all about "me" but that seems to be the norm these days.  It isn't just in the blogging world.  I've realized that people around me have become more and more narcissistic and self-centered in conversations.  I'm at fault too.  We, all of us, are focused on ourselves and our own lives.  There's nothing wrong with it as we all hear over and over again to take care of ourselves.  And it is true: No one does a better job of looking out for yourself than yourself.

Do we care about our friends and family?  Yes, of course.  But at the end of the day, most people only care about what they themselves have done and/or what they are doing next.  Am I jaded or am I just hanging out with the wrong people?

Anyway, am I the only one crazy to think that it's not wrong for Casey Anthony to be able to do a video blog about how she's feeling?

Thoughts on Blogging

The past year was not a very good one for blogging.  And 2012 isn't looking too good for it either.  As I've mentioned before I struggle with blogging because in order to be a REALLY good blogger one needs to reveal and share a LOT of private information, write about a specific topic that they are really invested in and care about (e.g., cooking, crafts, travel, etc.), and commit to writing on a very regular basis.

Now that I'm married and want to respect Mark's desire for more privacy, I don't write as often.  I also don't have a true passion that I want to write about: cooking (I love but don't need to write about it all the time plus I don't take photos of my cooking), crafting (I couldn't tell you how to make a crafty item to begin with LOL), travel (I love to but I don't do it as often to write about it or make it interesting).  So, that leaves us here.  Today.  I haven't been writing much lately.  I don't share much personally.  That doesn't make for an exciting blog.  It's true.  I know it.

I could write about what I would change in my marriage and reveal private and personal details that really shouldn't be shared publicly.  I will tell you though that I would get rid of cable TV.  I have a love/hate relationship with it.  I love it because during down time while working at home, I can catch up on the bad reality TV that I indulge in occasionally.  I hate it when Mark comes home from work and winds down by watching sports highlights.  I'd rather have him focus on me the minute he gets home but I'm OK with him watching a few minutes of TV and then focusing on me a little later.  I didn't have cable TV until Mark and I moved in together and I think I had a better quality of life without it.  I spent more time reading, doing other activities and catching up with friends on the phone.  Reality is that we won't be getting rid of cable so I need to get creative in getting us to turn off the TV.

I could write about how I'm feeling lonely in a new city and the ways in which I'm trying to meet new people and connect with others.  But that's boring.  I did sign up for a children's book illustration class.  It starts in February and I can't wait.  I know that signing up for a class doesn't guarantee that I'll make new friends but it might!  One can hope.

I could write about how much I love Winston but struggle with him every day and I've been talking to Mark about finding him a new home.  I cry about it every day lately it seems.  I hope that it is a phase that I'm going through but there are some valid concerns that I have with keeping him.  He is very demanding and while I knew it would be as the primary caregiver of him and as an independent person I'm now tied to the house because of him and I'm feeling depressed about it.  He also nips a lot and is underfoot almost all the time.  I've tripped over him a number of times and when he gets nippy I have a hard time dealing with him when I'm home with him by myself.  If we decide to find him a new home, I don't want to be judged because I already have tremendous guilt just because I've been thinking about it.  I love this puppy and I'm so glad he is in our lives but there are so many concerns that I have about keeping him.  Please don't judge, I'm already crying over this daily.

I could write about considering another change in my career.  I've been an independent consultant for the last two years but living in a new city is lonely and I miss the collegial atmosphere of an office.  So, I've been thinking about possibly going back to work in an office.  I also continue to focus on growing my independent consulting work and current clients so the possibilities remain wide open.  But who wants to hear about work?!  Not me!

I could write about gossip or do giveaways but I don't want people to read my blog just because I'm up on the latest celebrity divorce, marriage or baby.  I also don't want people to come to my blog because I'm giving away something cool.

So, I'm going to keep doing what I'm doing and not feel bad about it.  My reader numbers were at an all time high earlier in the year but have dropped off substantially and I'm OK with it.  I don't write for others.  I write for myself.  In 2012, I might write a lot or I might not update for a long time.  I won't apologize for either and I won't beat myself up either.

I do know that 2012 is going to be a big year and I can't wait for the year to reveal itself.  My little brother and his wife are having a baby girl in early February (if she's on time).  My cousin got engaged over the holidays.  Mark and I are house hunting.  My parents are in Thailand and doing good to help the world.

Whether or not you continue to read my blog, I thank you for your past support and wish you good health and happiness in 2012!

xo,

Travelogue 2011

In 2011, we stayed close to home as we knew that we were going to make some big changes in our lives (moving to Seattle).  Travel was not a priority though we were able to get a few fun trips into our schedules for some fun time.  

We're hoping to get in a few more fun trips in 2012 including Vancouver, WA and hopefully an overseas trip since we didn't go anywhere overseas in 2011 (a first for both of us in a long time).

Source

January

Los Angeles

February

Sonoma, CA

New Orleans, LA (business)

April

Washington, DC

June/July

Kauai, Hawaii

September

Reno, NV

Seattle, WA

Road trip from San Francisco to Seattle via Oregon

October/November

Chicago, IL

Did you go anywhere fun this year?  What was your favorite trip?

Merry Christmas to you!

May all your days be merry and bright!

Merry Christmas to you and yours!

xo,

A Cooking Tale...

First, there was the great cooking fiasco of August 2011 when I roasted a chicken and it never got hot enough to eat after 2.5 hours of cooking.  Mark and I were starving so we said screw it.  We had pizza for dinner that night.

Then, there was the great cooking fiasco of December 2011 last week when I tried a recipe from one of my favorite food bloggers, Eat Live Run, and we were ready to eat when I took a glass out of the cupboard and it stuck another glass and tiny shards of glass flew all across the kitchen including the two pots on the stove, which were bubbling away.  A TOTAL AND COMPLETE WASTE of what I know was going to be a delicious meal.  We ate pizza that night for dinner!

I think I'll attempt my recipe again sometime this week. I won't let one fiasco stop me!

As much as I love to cook and I humbly think I'm a pretty darn cook, I sometimes make mistakes and have terribly funny kitchen fiascoes.  What's the funniest or worst cooking fiasco that you've had in your kitchen?

#Reverb11: Where Did You Spend Money?

2011 was a year of saving for the Landwehr's.  The year before was a big spending year for us - a wedding and honeymoon (!), a new (used) car, etc.  I wish we had a money tree!!

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Our largest expense was a vacation to Hawaii - an early one year anniversary trip for us.  It was fabulous and much needed and deserved.  We both love to travel and budget our dollars for trips more than anything else.

We're also saving up as we hope to find a home to buy in the next few months.  So, our financial priorities are a little different now than they might have been a year or two ago.  I put myself on a shopping moratorium last year and I've been sticking with it for the most part.

I miss shopping terribly but I've held off and only purchased books for my Kindle and a pair of jeans.  My mom took me shopping for my birthday but other than those few clothing items, I haven't made many other purchases.  It helps that I don't need to dress up for work and that most of my clothes are classic and timeless so they haven't gone out of style (or at least I pretend that they haven't)!

Where have you saved or spent money?  Do you think you'll change your ways in 2012?

#Reverb11: What Do You Hope to Remember?

When I was 17 or 18 years old, my dad and I were having one of our "dates" and he said something that stuck with me.  He said to enjoy the time because with age time speeds up.  He's so right.  Time flies by so quickly these days.  I can't believe it is already December 7!

With how quickly the days speed by, I want to remember not just the fun memories but also the little things.  The little things often add up to the big ones that matter.

I see this everyday with how quickly Winston is growing.  We got him at 9 weeks and he's already 15 weeks old!  He changes everyday in little ways - both physically and with his little personality.

Hopefully, Mark and I will have kids in our future and I think that our future kid(s) will grow just as quickly and in even more exciting and better ways to document - hee hee.  In the meantime, whether it is enjoying Winston as a puppy or remember the time that Mark and I are taking to get to know our new hometown of Seattle, I hope that I can remember the little things and not just the big, monumental ones.

I try and try to remember the little memories that some of my family and friends have no problem remembering from childhood and I can't - the little details, the memories.  It doesn't bother me but I hope now that I'm older that I can make a point of remembering the little things!

What do you hope to remember?

#Reverb11: What Did You Discover?

I'm a really strong woman!  Not necessarily physically strong but I'm emotionally strong.

The past year was amazing but there were some tough times that I never thought I would have to experience (again, sorry for the evasiveness but somethings remain private even on a public forum).  Those times nearly knocked me off my feet but I discovered that I'm stronger than I think.

Relying on my partner/my sweet husband, Mark, really helped.  But not just relying on him and my parents, I found that when I reach deep inside, I'm very capable of relying on myself.  I can be my best partner - that's kind of dumb, isn't it? - but it is true.

By staying true to myself, allowing myself to fully accept and feel the emotions that I experience when going through tough times, I'm making myself a better person.  The statement "What Doesn't Kill You Makes You Stronger" is true.  The handful of events this year might have taken the breath away from me but didn't stop me.  I've discovered that on the other side, I'm a better, stronger woman in 2011!

I'm ready to face any challenges that come my way in 2012.

What did you discover about yourself, your life?

#Reverb11: When Did You Struggle

Struggle.  Isn't life in general a struggle?  Making the right decisions to live one's best life?  Overcoming disappointment?  Being the best partner to my husband even when I'm mad or upset about something.

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I'm a happy person in general with a positive attitude but I fully admit that this year has been tough.  The first year of marriage was not a hard one - I thought it was going to be but there was no struggle there.  Struggle is not the right word to describe marriage but work is.  Marriage takes a lot of work, a lot of time and effort, and a lot of love.  It means a lot of compromise, which is an area where I struggle and continue to push myself to do better.  I like to have my way.  I always have and because I'm lucky I often get my way but in marriage it doesn't work that way.  I will keep growing and stretching myself in my area to be a better wife.

The second year of being an independent consultant was a struggle.  I had to fight to succeed.  It's hard work.  I knew if I was going to stick with it and make it succeed, I needed to work really hard.  I did and there are still areas where I need to continue to work really hard for my clients and for myself.  This struggle will keep up for as long as I want to keep consulting.

I struggle with friendships.  It is hard living across the country from my oldest and dearest friends.  I miss them.  It is hard with families and children to stay connected.  I know in our hearts and minds that we are still close but I miss the daily connections.  I struggle to make new friends as Mark and I focus on building a life together here in Seattle and on starting a family.  I know new friends will come.  It just takes time and patience.

2011 was a year of change for me.  When there is change, there is struggle.  I look forward to 2012 where the new beginnings start to blossom!

How did you struggle in 2011?

#Reverb11: What Books Did You Read?

This year was not a highlight of reading books for me.  I love to read but reading somehow took the back seat for me.  I hope that 2012 is a 180 degree turn for reading.

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Some books of note that I read in 2012 for me included:

The Paris Wife by Paula McLain

One Day by David Nicholls

The Guernsey Potato Peel and Literary Society by Mary Ann Shaffer and Annie Barrows

The Hunger Games series by Suzanne Collins

I wish I had taken more time to read but other parts of life were a priority for me.  I'm definitely going to make an effort to read next year.

Any recommendations?

#Reverb11: Who Did You Meet?

I met and made some new friends in 2011 that I probably might not have if we hadn't moved to Seattle.  I also reconnected with a very special friend from my past who I might not have if it weren't for this move.  Isn't life funny like that sometimes?

Through a very good friend who lives in Philadelphia, I was connected with a friend of hers who moved to Seattle shortly before Mark and I.  Since we've been here, she and I have met for lunch a few times and are planning a double date with our husbands soon.  It's nice to have some commonality with her of our mutual friend but also to know that she and I really enjoy each others company.

A little more than ten years ago, I worked for a large global PR firm.  There I met and many friends with my colleagues, one of those women is a woman I was pretty friendly with at the time.  We spent time together socially and I was invited to her wedding though I was unable to attend for a reason I don't remember now.  She has since divorced from her husband and moved out West.  She and I have reconnected and spent some really good quality time together since my move.

There are others who I've met this year but these two stand out as they are a part of my new life here in Seattle.  It's hard to meet and make friends at this age - especially without kids - and it's nice to know that it is still possible!  I look forward to meeting more new friends in the coming years.

Who have you met in 2011?

Catching Up: #Reverb11: 1st Prompt: Where Did 2011 begin?

This is a tough one.  The start to 2011 was a very difficult one.  I won't go into the difficult details but I'll cover the top line ones.  I know that's unfair of me to not share but I've got to keep some secrets here :)

Mark and I were in Los Angeles for the New Year.  The Wisconsin Badgers were playing in the Rose Bowl - Mark went to U. of Wisconsin at Madison - and so we road tripped down from San Francisco to see friends and watch the game.  We didn't have tickets so we planned to tailgate and then go to a bar to watch the game.

Instead, on NYE, I ended up in the ER.  Luckily, I was released about 5 minutes before midnight and so we kissed and welcomes the New Year in our car - so much better than being hooked up to an IV in a hospital bed.  The following day, I still wasn't feeling well, so we skipped tailgating and instead found a quiet bar to watch the game.  Sadly, the Badgers lost that game.

Overall, the beginning of 2011 wasn't a very good one.  Thankfully, the rest of the year has been MUCH better!

Here's hoping that 2012 is a much better start!

Growing Out My Bangs

For the past four years, I've had the same hairstyle (more or less the same).  One of the biggest components of it are my bangs.  A few months ago, I decided it was time for a change and I cut my hair a little shorter and started growing out my bangs.  Pretty much working towards a long, layered bob.

I like the length it is now though I need to get it cut again soon but I HATE growing out my bangs.  It is not fun.  I don't feel attractive as they grow out.  In order for me to keep the hair out of my eyes, I put barrettes and bobby pins to hold the hair back and those make me feel about 12 years old.

There are all kinds of articles about how to gracefully grow out bangs but I've pretty much tried all of the tricks and am tired of them.  So, I think this means I need a little retail therapy and find some more fun headbands and clips to help me out.

I love these!

Source

Any tips on growing out bangs?  How long will it take?

New Favorite Thing: My Blender

A few weeks ago, when my mom was in town, we went to Costco to get dog food for our new puppy and some other supplies like paper towels, etc.  I also went for a blender and some frozen strawberries and mixed berries.

Nearly every day since I got the blender, I've been making a berry smoothie with a handful (or two) of strawberries and mixed berries with vanilla bean yogurt and a splash of milk.  The smoothies are delicious!

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I've been thinking about trying a kale smoothie as that would help me get more of my dark green veggies into my body.  I'm scared though that I'll be totally yucked out by it.  Do you have a good green smoothie recipe to share?!

Any other smoothie suggestions?  What else can I make in my blender that's delicious and good for you?

What's For Dinner?!

It is not a bad day in Seattle - in fact, it was quite pleasant with the sun shining brightly!  Yesterday was pouring rain and so when I made my list of meals, I focused on comfort food.  I pulled a recipe from my "archive" of recipes that I haven't tried yet but seemed perfect for a Monday night.

This Vegetable-Parmesan Stew from Food & Wine is a healthy, comfort food option served with a loaf of warm, crusty bread.

Source

INGREDIENTS
6 cups low-sodium chicken broth
3 Parmigiano-Reggiano rinds (about 2 ounces each)
1/4 cup plus 2 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil
3/4 pound small white button mushrooms, stemmed and caps quartered
1 pound small zucchini, halved lengthwise and cut crosswise into 1 1/2-inch pieces
2 red bell peppers, cut into 1 1/2-inch pieces
1 large leek, white and tender green parts only, quartered lengthwise and cut into 1 1/2-inch pieces
Salt and freshly ground pepper 

2 pounds tomatoes, peeled and coarsely chopped 

3 ounces capellini, broken into 1/2-inch pieces 

2 tablespoons finely chopped basil 

Toasted peasant bread, for serving

DIRECTIONS
1.    In a large saucepan, combine the broth and Parmigiano-Reggiano rinds and bring to a boil. Simmer over moderately low heat until the rinds are very soft and the broth is reduced to 4 cups, about 30 minutes.
2.    Meanwhile, in a large enameled cast-iron casserole, heat 2 tablespoons of the oil. Add the mushrooms and cook over high heat, stirring occasionally, until lightly browned, about 8 minutes. Add 3 tablespoons of the oil along with the zucchini, peppers and leek and season lightly with salt and pepper. Cook, stirring occasionally, until the vegetables are very lightly browned, about 5 minutes. Add the tomatoes and cook, stirring, until slightly broken down, about 2 minutes. Add the broth and the Parmigiano rinds and bring to a boil. Simmer over low heat until the vegetables are tender, about 20 minutes.
3.    In a medium skillet, heat the remaining 1 tablespoon of olive oil. Add the broken pasta and cook over high heat, stirring constantly, until lightly browned, about 2 minutes. Stir the pasta into the stew and cook until al dente, about 2 minutes. Discard the rinds and stir in the basil. Serve the vegetable stew in deep bowls, passing toasted bread at the table.

On Being Thankful

This year was not necessarily an easy year but it was one full of reasons to be thankful on this day of Thanksgiving:

1. Mark and I made the decision to leave San Francisco to a city where the cost of living is not a sieve and we were fortunate to land in Seattle - another beautiful city - with Mark in a wonderful new position and a comfortable (temporary) roof over our heads

2. I put my mind to making my PR consulting career path actually happen since I launched it a little more than two years ago and with the support of friends and family and my own hard work, it has taken off

3. In spite of this tough economic time that many people in the United States and around the world are facing, Mark and I are financially stable

4. Our bodies are (more-or-less) healthy and our minds are clear

5. We brought a new addition into our family a little more than four weeks ago, Winston, and we can't imagine our lives without him (I can't imagine how spoiled an actual baby will be given how spoiled our little guy Winston is...)!

There are so many other reasons to be thankful that can go unspoken.  Many times people tell me that I'm lucky.  I tell myself that I'm lucky too.  But, is it luck?  Or is it just life?  I've worked hard to be where I am in life and I work hard to maintain it.  It takes a lot of work to make a marriage successful.  It takes a lot of work to keep financially healthy.  It takes a lot of work to take care of a puppy :)

I guess overall I'm trying to say that while I'm thankful for the things in my life, I also am grateful for the people in my life who support the hard work that I do to make my life the way that it is...my husband, my parents, my friends.

Source

What are you grateful for this Thanksgiving Day?

Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours!

xo,

What's For Dinner Tonight?

Thinking about what to make for dinner tonight made me sit down and review what we had earlier this week:

Sunday: Taco night with gluten-free corn tortillas

Monday: Spaghetti and meatballs (I threw out the GF for the night)

Tuesday: Roasted chicken with brown rice and salad

Wednesday: Beef stew with tomatoes and green pepper with garlic roasted potatoes

Thursday: I went to dinner with a friend and Mark had an oven roasted chicken breast sandwich

This is not Winston but it looks kind of like him (Source)

So the question is what should I make for dinner tonight?  I've found a few yummy ideas on one of my favorite food bloggers Eat, Live, Run: 30 minute lemon brown sugar chicken and beef tenderloin with apricot and olives.  Both sound delicious but I'm not quite sure which I'll make tonight.  Maybe I'll buy the ingredients for both and make one tonight and the other a different night!

What are you making for dinner tonight?

Hilarious!

I want a camel for a pet!

A Good Cause: I'm Too Young For This! Cancer Foundation

In addition to the clients I have who help me contribute financially to my household budget, I also do pro bono PR for a non-profit group that I've come to hold dear to my heart.  The I'm Too Young For This! Cancer Foundation is in place to help young adults (15-39) facing a cancer diagnosis.  Started by Matthew Zachary in 2007, i[2]y helps young adult cancer survivors find resources that help them deal with issues surrounding a cancer diagnosis as well as connect them through social networks in person and online.

This coming March, i[2]y is holding their 5th annual OMG! Cancer Summit for young adults.  If you or someone you know is a young adult cancer survivor, patient or caregiver of a young adult with cancer than this summit is for you.  I encourage you to register and attend the summit either in person in Las Vegas or virtually.  You can register here.

You can also support i[2]y with a financial contribution that is 100% tax deductible and will help Matthew keep the organization running and keep all of the resources that i[2]y provides available for free or at limited cost to participants who are already facing significant financial challenges.  You can make a donation here after reading this appeal from Matthew.

If your corporation can sponsor i[2]y or the OMG! 2012 Cancer Summit, please leave a comment with your contact information and I will contact you.

Thanks in advance!  This is a wonderful organization making a difference.

xo,