#Reverb11: When Did You Struggle

Struggle.  Isn't life in general a struggle?  Making the right decisions to live one's best life?  Overcoming disappointment?  Being the best partner to my husband even when I'm mad or upset about something.

Source

I'm a happy person in general with a positive attitude but I fully admit that this year has been tough.  The first year of marriage was not a hard one - I thought it was going to be but there was no struggle there.  Struggle is not the right word to describe marriage but work is.  Marriage takes a lot of work, a lot of time and effort, and a lot of love.  It means a lot of compromise, which is an area where I struggle and continue to push myself to do better.  I like to have my way.  I always have and because I'm lucky I often get my way but in marriage it doesn't work that way.  I will keep growing and stretching myself in my area to be a better wife.

The second year of being an independent consultant was a struggle.  I had to fight to succeed.  It's hard work.  I knew if I was going to stick with it and make it succeed, I needed to work really hard.  I did and there are still areas where I need to continue to work really hard for my clients and for myself.  This struggle will keep up for as long as I want to keep consulting.

I struggle with friendships.  It is hard living across the country from my oldest and dearest friends.  I miss them.  It is hard with families and children to stay connected.  I know in our hearts and minds that we are still close but I miss the daily connections.  I struggle to make new friends as Mark and I focus on building a life together here in Seattle and on starting a family.  I know new friends will come.  It just takes time and patience.

2011 was a year of change for me.  When there is change, there is struggle.  I look forward to 2012 where the new beginnings start to blossom!

How did you struggle in 2011?

#Reverb11: Who Did You Meet?

I met and made some new friends in 2011 that I probably might not have if we hadn't moved to Seattle.  I also reconnected with a very special friend from my past who I might not have if it weren't for this move.  Isn't life funny like that sometimes?

Through a very good friend who lives in Philadelphia, I was connected with a friend of hers who moved to Seattle shortly before Mark and I.  Since we've been here, she and I have met for lunch a few times and are planning a double date with our husbands soon.  It's nice to have some commonality with her of our mutual friend but also to know that she and I really enjoy each others company.

A little more than ten years ago, I worked for a large global PR firm.  There I met and many friends with my colleagues, one of those women is a woman I was pretty friendly with at the time.  We spent time together socially and I was invited to her wedding though I was unable to attend for a reason I don't remember now.  She has since divorced from her husband and moved out West.  She and I have reconnected and spent some really good quality time together since my move.

There are others who I've met this year but these two stand out as they are a part of my new life here in Seattle.  It's hard to meet and make friends at this age - especially without kids - and it's nice to know that it is still possible!  I look forward to meeting more new friends in the coming years.

Who have you met in 2011?

It's a Lasagna Kind Of Night!

We are slowly getting used to the rainy weather.  I actually don't mind it so much.  It may be because I'm such a homebody that it makes it feel all cozy to me.  I'm sure I'll be singing a different tune come February!

To get into the fall mood, I'm making one of Mark's favorite meals of all: lasagna.  I am going to make a modified version of the one I made him for his birthday.  It'll be delicious nonetheless!

We're getting more and more settled with only a handful of boxes left.  We may leave those packed too since we hope to be out of this apartment sooner rather than later...

This past weekend was the San Francisco Fleet Week Air Show.  I read all about it on my friends' Facebook postings.  It made me a little sad and miss San Francisco.  But, I'm adjusting otherwise.

It helps to have friends and acquaintances already here in our new home town.  On Thursday, I'll have dinner with a colleague and friend from my days of DC.  She's been here for a while now.  I haven't seen her in years and I'm super excited.  We also have dinner plans with one of Mark's college friends on the weekend.

One of my best friends, who lives in Philadelphia, introduced me to one of her friends who is also new to Seattle.  We met for lunch when I was here a few weeks ago and I'm hoping to get a lunch scheduled with her again soon!

I found a dance studio that offers beginning ballet classes.  They have drop in classes, so I'm going to start going once a week.  I took ballet when I was a wee little one and then again a few years ago for a bit.  I can't wait.  I think it'll be tons of fun to go again.  Hopefully, I won't make a fool out of myself :)  And, maybe I'll even meet a nice person or two!

And so getting settled continues...

Making New Friends

In 2007, when I first moved to San Francisco, I was lucky.  I had a boyfriend who had a very large group of wonderful friends.  I was taken into the fold.  But after our relationship ended, I was uncomfortable being around that group of people.  I had to make my own way and meet new friends on my own.

San Francisco is an interesting town.  The people are nice and it is a town full of transients.  But the groups of friends are quite clique-y.  It can be tough.

Now, after being here a little more than four years, I have my small group of wonderful friends.  I admit that the past year has been a challenge.  I've been more focused on being a newlywed and dealing with other personal things than spending time with my girlfriends.  But, as I've been saying goodbye to the people who have been a part of my life for the better part of the last four years, I'm going to miss them and I hope that my friendship with them will continue over the distance.

While I still make my marriage a priority, I know that being proactive after we move to Seattle will be important for me to making new friends and meeting new people.  I don't work in a traditional sense by going to an office nor do we have children, where I would be in situations where I have the chance to meet new people, so I need to be extra outgoing and make the opportunities to meet new people.

I think it's a lot harder to meet and make new friends at this age.  Most people either have their set of friends already well established or they have children and are deeply involved in their lives.  So, I have a plan and I hope it works!

Our apartment building has a gym in it so we don't have to join a gym but I might find a yoga, pilates or other exercise class that I want to take.  I also plan to sign up for a different sort of class - I haven't yet decided if it will be a creative writing class or an art class.  I love to write and took a creative writing class a few years ago, here in SF.  When I was in high school and college, I took a number of drawing and painting classes and loved them.  My options are wide open and I'm excited!

I'm ready to meet and create a group of new wonderful, women friends! I know that it will take time but I hope in the coming years, I'll be able to create a circle of friends who know each other as well as the girls from Sex and the City (maybe that dream is unrealistic?)!

Source

If you have moved to a new city, how did you make your new friends - outside of work and school?  Any tips you can share?